So yep I’m all packed up and on my way to college. I’m still not sure if I’m going to keep using this tumblr in the future, but at least for now this is the end. I’ll probably come back here occasionally every now and then but I don’t think that it’s something I will continue to actively use. I’m starting something new in my life which means I need to let go of some things that chain me to the past, and this blog is one of them. I guess it’s nice to have this around as basically a record of my high school life. It’s kind of like a little online time capsule, recording all the music I liked, dumb letters I’ve written to people who will never read them, art that inspired me, writing that moved me, tv shows and books I grew to love. But I’m really not the same person I was when I started tumblr. I guess if I could talk to the dumb 15-year old who first made this tumblr, I’d tell her that even though everything might be different now, it’s for the better, even if it doesn’t seem so as it’s happening. And I’d tell her that you might think high school blows but you’ll make it out alive and happier than you ever were. After fishing through my archive, I realized that so many of the low points hardly mean anything to me now. I’m going to be a college student now, and I am so much more positive and conscience of my actions than I was 3 years ago. I just grew to be a different (hopefully better) person, or maybe I just became happy. Maybe in 4 years I’ll check this post again and smile. Or I could be back here in like 2 weeks when I get bored again, but eh we’ll see.

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College move-in day!!
I knew it wasn’t too important, but it made me sad anyway.
written by J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye (via petrichour)

(Source: simply-quotes, via wasarahbi)

As time goes on, you’ll understand. What lasts, lasts; what doesn’t, doesn’t. Time solves most things. And what time can’t solve, you have to solve yourself.
written by Haruki Murakami (via rabbitinthemoon)

(via bloggingfrenzy)

1,953 notes
#this summer 
nevver:

This is the last chance…
38,915 notes

Elton John - Your Song

When your eyeliner is on point, your life is on point.
written by Confucius 479 BCE (via jeeeperscreepers)

(via superrichgoats-deactivated20130)

Life update

The first time I saw her..
Everything in my head went quiet.
All the ticks, all the constantly refreshing images just disappeared.

When you have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, you don’t really get quiet moments.

Even in bed, I’m thinking:

Did I lock the doors? Yes.
Did I wash my hands? Yes.
Did I lock the doors? Yes.
Did I wash my hands? Yes.

But when I saw her, the only thing I could think about was the hairpin curve of her lips..
Or the eyelash on her cheek—
the eyelash on her cheek—
the eyelash on her cheek.

I knew I had to talk to her.

I asked her out six times in thirty seconds.

She said yes after the third one, but none of them felt right, so I had to keep going.

On our first date, I spent more time organizing my meal by color than I did eating it, or talking to her..
But she loved it.

She loved that I had to kiss her goodbye sixteen times or twenty-four times at different times of the day.

She loved that it took me forever to walk home because there are lots of cracks on our sidewalk.

When we moved in together, she said she felt safe, like no one would ever rob us because I definitely lock the door eighteen times.

I’d always watch her mouth when she talked—
when she talked—
when she talked—
when she talked;
when she said she loved me, her mouth would curl up at the edges.

At night, she’d lay in bed and watch me turn all the lights off.. And on, and off, and on, and off, and on, and off, and on, and off, and on, and off.
She’d close her eyes and imagine that the days and nights were passing in front of her.

But then.. She said I was taking up too much of her time.

That I couldn’t kiss her goodbye so much because I was making her late for work..

When she said she loved me, her mouth was a straight line..

When I stopped in front of a crack in the sidewalk, she just kept walking..

And last week she started sleeping at her mother’s place.

She told me that she shouldn’t have let me get so attached to her; that this whole thing was a mistake, but..

How can it be a mistake that I don’t have to wash my hands after I touch her?

Love is not a mistake, and it’s killing me that she can run away from this and I just can’t.

I can’t go out and find someone new because I always think of her.

Usually, when I obsess over things, I see germs sneaking into my skin.
I see myself crushed my an endless succession of cars..
And she was the first beautiful thing I ever got stuck on.

I want to wake up every morning thinking about the way she holds her steering wheel..
How she turns shower knobs like she opening a safe.

How she blows out candles—
blows out candles—
blows out candles—
blows out candles—
blows out—….

Now, I just think about who else is kissing her.

I can’t breathe because he only kisses her once—he doesn’t care if it’s perfect!

I want her back so bad..

I leave the door unlocked.

I leave the lights on.


written by Neil Hilborn, “OCD” (via pigmenting)

(via paper-trees)

I actually love this dumb little town so much. I think happiness is never wanting to really leave the moment you’re in, and that’s how the past 4 months have felt to me. 

I like drinking coffee alone and reading alone. I like riding the bus alone and walking home alone. It gives me time to think and set my mind free. I like eating alone and listening to music alone. But when I see a mother with her child, a girl with her lover, or a friend laughing with their best friend, I realize that even though I like being alone, I don’t fancy being lonely. The sky is beautiful, but the people are sad. I just need someone who won’t run away.
written by (via stellacooper)

(Source: buddhacoffee, via superrichgoats-deactivated20130)